I'm just an ex-con trying to get his kids back, but I don't think getting a Deviantart is going to help , oh well.
but Anyway, I'm Drew. I live on Easter Island with my super hype girlfriend Sam,
I LOVE old video games, especially the SNES, my favorite console of all time. My favorite game is Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island. But that's always subject to change. Castlevania, and well...pretty much anything on an SNES cartridge is FREAKING GREAT.
But anywho, let me tell you somethings about myself, I was born on a pirate ship when my parents were being held hostage by Davy Jones himself. When I came out, I was wielding the Master Sword and I defeated his entire crew while still attached to my mother. Then I freed my parents and piloted the boat through a plethora of icebergs and rocks, and made it safely to Newquay, England. My mom then cut the umbilical cord and I then puked rainbows.
JUMP TO AGE 9
I was at a McDonald's Playplace in Brunswick, Ohio minding my own business when a scumbag 12 year old challenged me to a race up the confusing structure and whoever made it down the giant slide at the top first won. I accepted this challenge, when the fat lady brought my mother's order in, we would start racing, we were both sweating bullets. The lady walked in and we were off. He got a head start when we both jumped in because I realized I wasn't wearing socks, and that was frowned upon there. So I beat up this kid and stole his socks. They were those cheap Walmart brand socks, so I knew this would hinder my performance. Lucky for me though, I don't think my opponent knew this track very well because he seemed to be lost, lucky for me I raced this track most often. I was now ahead, I was on the part of the construction where you have to jump up from platform to platform. My adversary passed me there, for it was easier for him to jump up because he was much taller than I was. I wasn't discouraged though I kept persevering, I would NOT give up. I kicked on the afterburners and crawled like I was a hungry baby who had seen his mom get her breasts out. I wasn't going to lose today. He got into the slide, but I wasn't far behind. Little did he know I was an olympic gold medalist in sliding down tubes, he stood no chance. I assumed the position they had taught me at slide camp and shut my eyes, I felt myself blast by my enemy and I smiled to myself. When I emerged, I did a reverse double backflip-barrelroll-69 maneuver and landed a perfect 10 landing, my opponent emerged two seconds later charred because I was going so fast I had set the slide to flames. All the women there crawled to my feet and I was victorious, as always. I have NEVER lost a McDonald's Playplace challenge. Ever.
JUMP TO AGE 12
JUMP TO AGE 14
I met my girlfriend, Sam
at the slide training camp when I was a lad. I never really approached her until I met her again here. I was in Narnia battling the White Witch when I grabbed a Minotaur by the throat, stabbed it in the chest and threw it down. I looked to my left and saw her, she was tackling a tiger by the legs. Time seemed to freeze and there we were, staring at each other. I was in disbelief in the amount of beauty one girl could have, and I just had to approach her, I just had to. A centaur and a dwarf told me "She really likes you dude, ask her out." I then removed my helmet and walked over to her, as she was as well. I then asked "You want to go see Wreck-It-Ralph later?" She thought for a second and then said "well...alright." I hoped that was just shyness and not skepticism. Then a polar bear tackled me and she stabbed it in the back with her battleaxe, I could tell then that she actually cared about me, I couldn't believe it. I was so happy. Love you Sam!
JUMP TO NOW
Well, that's me in a nutshell and some of the TOTALLY TRUE STORIES about some events in my life, I could have wrote more, but I'd be here all day and I don't want to be late for my meeting with Princess Celestia.
Oh wait, a quick description of this Dingledangart page. I draw whatever I want! Well...mostly pictures of me and Sam, SHE DOESN'T THINK IT'S CREEPY, OK? Maybe I'll draw ponies and other random garbage if I get bored. I'm not really THAT dedicated, I only draw when I absolutely have NOTHING to do. I might add more to this later...We'll see
HAVE A BOOPIN' DAY! -Drew Mcanus